I hope we can all find true love and affection in life. I used to date just for fun, for casual sex and for my ego to have someone to call its own. I can’t imagine ever going back to that mentality now that I’ve experienced the blessing of real romantic love and affection. I couldn’t imagine waking up without my wife, without the person I’ve grown to love so much, who I keep on learning to love more and more as the days go by. We are about to celebrate two years of marriage. In total we’ve been together for like five years now, and it’s been so amazing to share so many wonderful moments with her throughout those years. I don’t claim to be an expert at living life, and I’m not really too sure how I ended up with such an amazing lady, but I’m sure glad life worked out the way it did, and I pray it continues on the same course. No matter who you’re with, what really matters in a relationship is commitment and communication. There needs to be open communication between both partners, and even then there will be misunderstandings, but the goal is to lower their frequency. When there is true commitment, both partners are willing to put in the necessary work for a relationship to continue to run smoothly, acknowledging that trouble is bound to come no matter how careful we are, but that with the power of the love which we share we will be able to overcome it. If this is not something which is understood then any small problem can break a relationship’s foundation. It is much easier to call it quits than it is to put aside our pride and at least attempt to make things work out. I knew that it was meant to be for Maria and I when I understood that we shared this common attitude towards love, towards our own relationship. We may have a whole lot of differences, but the main thing that matters is that we are both fully committed to each other. Some might say we are both deluded, and that one of us is bound to abandon the other as soon as things get really tough, but the truth can only be known by those having the experience anyway. We must each use our discernment when choosing a partner, especially when we are considering one for an entire lifetime, but all I can personally do is relate my own experience of what I believe to be my relationship with the woman that I was destined to be with, my life partner, my wife. When two people who share this attitude of sincere commitment to each other come together, this is when true love can blossom and grow. When we are not ready to face the daily battle of sacrificing our own desires for the good of those we love, if we are looking for all we can gain from a relationship without considering what we can contribute to it, then we are not ready for real love. Love is not selfish, and is always looking for the good of the beloved, attempting to love the beloved as itself. We must at least love our life partner as we do ourselves, if we are not yet capable of loving our neighbors and the whole world’s population as we love ourselves. When there is true connection, sexual embrace and union take on a brand new dimension, a holy aspect. When there is true connection, when trust and true love has been established between two lovers then the whole character of a relationship is holy in a way, it is the truest form of union there can be. Every day I thank God for the opportunity of sharing my life with my wife, and I pray for the strength to love her even more than I love myself, to exceed her expectations and to become fully selfless towards her, to know her always more and more, to become completely united. We all need to cherish those we claim we love, we should appreciate everything about them. I never used to think of these things when I was living the party life, when I dated girls here and there just based on appearance and nothing more. When we live in this way, we come to believe that love is a mere superstition, and that sexual pleasure is the highest human pleasure possible. We chase sexual pleasure all our lives when we think in such a way. We become completely ignorant to the truth that sexual pleasure can never compare to, and can only be truly experienced and enjoyed when it is a product of, true love. We take the idea of love away from sex, so that we can commercialize sex and ridicule love. We do this since we are afraid to be vulnerable, we are afraid to truly be one with another, to part ways with our own selfish need to fulfill our own pleasures whenever we wish. When we come to experience true love in a romantic relationship, there is always a deep connecion which keeps both partners in a state of understanding, of forigveness and of support for each other. There is no blame, no using each other to gain anything. My wife and I use our debit cards interchanghably, and we work at the same company. We use the same phone most of the time, there is nothing to hide, no secrets. How much destructive stress is generated by lying and cheating, why not dedicate oneself to growing one’s relationship or marriage instead of chasing limitless sexual pleasure? In such a loveless society as we live in now, it is no wonder that so many people have cut out love from their hearts, that so many people have romantic relationships which are completely devoide of love. I wonder why the miracle happened to me, perhaps so that I could grow up and have something, someone, to live for, to truly love.
To be continued tomorrow, on Day 58.
~ Rebel Spirit